fake tales of san francisco

I feel so... not me lately.

yah.. depressed sounds like a good word.

but I don't know why.

well, maybe I do.

I think it's school, and the fact that I'm home sick. and the fact i cant go home for march break. thanks mom and dad...

and I think itis because I stress over the smallest of things. and I stress over the big ones not enough. i have enough money to due me for 3 months..

BARELY.

yippee....

so now I'm looking through the phone book for printing shops and what-not for a place I could possibly apply for. if I don't get something, I guess it's retail shit for me. or a lovely restaurant gig.

I hate dealing with people. manily because most of them are incompentant. or not english....

I don't have anything against foregniers... *fuck I can't spell* I just can't understand a damn thing they say, because of their accents. it's sad really... but I just can't... and sometimes I feel awful for it.

oh well.

but ya... if you see me sad looking.. and I say some bullshit that I'm "TIRED" it really means that somethings wrong, but I don't want to talk about it..

if I do, i'll come to you, if not... just.. let me be.

I need some me time... and I may come across as distance.. it's just me going through my phase thing... I do this a lot... not sure why though.. but it helps me.

well... I think it does.

and some things are starting to get to me...


I NEED A FUCKING BREAK....

and I can't go fucking anywheres...

FUCK.

and I need a new roomate soon..

I can't deal with Jody's bullshit anymore. nice person and all... but she needs a slap in the face of what reality is sometimes...

oh and I just looooove how she's having a fucking party here, and didn't even bother to ask me if I'm ok with it.

and I ask her all the time if she's ok with me having a party, whenever I do.

AND THIS IS MY APARTMENT FOR FUCK SAKES.


so I'm going to throw a party on *opps* the same day she does, and "forget" to tell her about it..

maybe she'll find out about it on facebook like I did.

weeeeee!

so I'm depressed and bitter. and maybe a tad bit broken on the inside.

yah, sounds about right...


I just want spring to come and to go home....

but that won't happen anytime soon.

yea for life.

Crime of the Century

i think everyone can relate to this...


the one you love/like is the one that doesnt feel the same towards you; and the one who has feelings for you, you dont back...


its a visious cycle... and i want out.. now please....


and why am i so paraniod at times?? really though? sometimes i wish i wasnt so much like my grand-mother. pretty soon ill be taking pills to calm me down as well...

Whatever people say i am, thats what im not

another weekend going by once again too quickly.

though i had a great weekend, which started on thrusday. birthday party at hunters and it was trivia night. holy crap, so much fun. and we had cake! joys.

friday night, house "cooling" party. oh my. what fun. going to miss that apartment. oh well.

then saturday night, movies (because i said so... which was really great, and made me hate movies even more, for making me wish my life was like a movie, and that i could fin true love like that. holy crap, fuck you movies, fuck you), then doolys (really fun! i love playing pool, despite the fact i cant really play all that well, but better then most), then a trip to Babas (a really cool band was playing, and wow, theyre really good. love their stuff).

all-in-all, this weekend was really good. and tonight, im going to finish it all off with homework! isnt that just lovely? i think so.

I Bet That You Look Good On The Dance Floor

omgvalentinesdayiscomingsoon.... ihopeigetavalentine....


writing like that is hard work...


butireallydohopeido...


<3<3<3 luvs for my friends! cause they rock my socks! XD

Shoot the Runner

fuck.

well this weekend was pretty good. started off with a date on friday night, to find out the guy is a bit wacked. then on saturday night, i had pre drinks with this guy im currently seeing... another brad. hahaha. brads... fuck. anyways, we watched the hockey game, and did some fun stuff. lol. then i went to the islander, i was pretty drunk. but it was fun. haha. jody was hitting on this gross old cop... oh my. chev was drunk, kelley almost got into a fight with 3 boys! oh my! hahah. wish i was there to see that. i probably would shot my mouth off. haha. yea for liquor. next weekend, maybe a party here??? who knows. i want one. want to invite brad to come over so everyone can meet. heeh. it would be fun! right???


well i guess thats it. i should finish my structure project for tomorrow. gaaaah..

BOYS MAKE MY HEAD HURT.


that is all.

thanks, that was fun

boys suck.

stupid boys.

omg! shoes.

hahaha.. ooh.. i kill myself. yah, boys suck.. haha... ooh.. what a confusing life i live! brad is all like, i want to be just friends so i can figure out what i want to do in life.. blah blah.. power to him, but i didnt like the jerking around bit. like, we're seeing each other, then he goes out with another girl.. the we fight, and all is well, then hes all like, im going out west, i cry, we say we love each other, hes out west, says he misses me, and loves me, comes home a month later, and says we should be just friends. thanks asshole. dont tell me shit, if nothing is going to become of it.

but then, just as that happens, an old guy friend of mine, comes back into my life, and maybe all is well again. annnd.. theres a cute boy living under me in the apartment. which is nice. i should "bump" into him sometime. haha.. call me boy crazy! it has its ups and downs, but all-in-all its fun, but then again, in kelleys words it can be like DEATH. yea boys.

and in other news today, i got an audition for a voice acting job doing a female voice for the animation company Trapeze. haha. i applied there, for animation, and where did that get me? it got me to where i am today, BACK IN SCHOOL. which i love! but still. maybe, this will get my foot in the door perhaps? i dont know, im not going to get my hopes up, ive been doing that too much lately, only to bring myself down 2 notches more. LIFE IS GRAND. oh i hope design gets me places. cause i really want to do soething with my art, and make some good money. oh, that would be lovely! and maybe get a nice place somewheres in the city of wherever.

sometimes i wish i lived a normal life, but then i just slap that bitch and tell her to shut up, cause i love all this insaneness, it makes life a bit more fun, despite all of the downfalls.

this is me not working on stuff i should be

Firsts/Lasts

FIRST REAL BEST FRIEND:
Sharon MacKenzie - till she moved and we havent talked since.

FIRST SCHOOL:
West Pictou Elementry

FIRST CELL PHONE:
my pink one!

FIRST FUNERAL:
Grandfathers

FIRST PET:
Buddy, my black lab.

FIRST BIG TRIP:
Quebec....I need to get out more

FIRST CELEBRITY CRUSH:
JTT. hahaha...

FIRST TIME OUT OF THE COUNTRY?:
NEVER....

FIRST JOB:
Eastern Sing Print... they own my soul...

FIRST FACEBOOK FRIEND:
uh.. you.

EVERYONE HAS THEIR LASTS:

LAST PERSON YOU HUGGED:
jojo or pj...

LAST CAR RIDE:
when kelley drove me home. like always. id be dead without her.

LAST TIME YOU CRIED?:
today.

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED:
the davinci code.

LAST FOOD YOU ATE:
tv dinner thinger and water.

LAST ITEM BOUGHT:
food.

LAST SHIRT WORN:
uuh.. a purple t-shirt

LAST PHONE CALL:
Brad.

LAST TEXT MESSAGE:
Pj.

LAST THING YOU TOUCHED:
uhh... this key borad...

LAST FUNERAL:
great aunt

LAST TIME AT THE MALL:
Saturday

LAST TIME YOU WERE EXCITED FOR SOMETHING:
Saturday

LAST PERSON YOU SAW:
Kelley

LAST THING YOU DRANK:
Water

LAST PERSON THAT BROKE YOUR HEART:
Brad. hahaha.... =(

LAST TIME YOU WERE REALLY HONESTLY HAPPY?:
i cant remember when... haha.. how sad i am...

Gaaaah!!

boys.. they hurt the mind and the heart.....

sometimes, they just plain out confuse the fuck out of me...

i have no idea whats going on anymore... and that sucks...

sometimes i feel like im being used... which sucks even more...

and then... sometimes, i feel like im on cloud number 9... which sucks when i come back down....

gaaaaah.. i dont like this at all....

i think i'll go back to bed....

WOOO!

BRADS BACK!!!! i feel so happy.. ooh.. he surprised me!! he told me some of his friends were going over here to the bars.. and they may stop in.. so i was all like.. yah ok. annd and.. i wasnt excpeting him at all.. caus ei was talking to him online. and he was all like.. yah.. working today.. and stuff.. gaaah!!! then the friends came.. he wasnt there with them.. then there was a knock at my door. .so i go and look.. and no one was there.. then i looked down the hallway.. and he was there!!!! gaaaaah!! awww... in kelleys words "it made my heart go... OHH..." oh.. it did!!! i almost cried.. ahaha... but ooh.. it was the best!!! and stuff.. oooh.. i love him... but he only stayed for a bit, cuase he just got home and wanted to go out with his friends.. ooh.. i wouldve went out.. but i had class this morning.. though i couldve went out, cause the class was like what? 10 mins long.. and now i feel like death cause im sick.. ugh.. i thinkn its norwalk.. which is not cool.. anyways.. so yah.. brads back.. im happy and this weekend is going to be the weekend of delights!!! ooh.. yea!!!

shout out to chev cause its her birthday!!! happy birthday!!!

ooh..... my heart.... i think aprils in love.... for the first time ever..

Happy 2007!!

holy shit its 2007!! i cant believe it.. its werid.. 2007! SEVEN!!! i can remeber when it was 2000!! now theres a 7!!! holy frig i feel old.

anyways.. christmas was fun! and new years was great as well! kelley and chev came over and it was good! we were drinking, eating and being merry! haha! and hopefully this weekend will be just as great!! 3 birthdays in one!! wooo!! shout out to PJ, cause today is his birthday! woo!

ooh.. its soo good to be back, though it feels as though only a weekend went by and not 2 weeks. lol.. good god! time passes by so fast when youre having fun!